lessons from the dinner table

Well there is a first time for everything. Last night Mark was away over dinner time. I discovered when I was ready to serve dinner that the ham I had glazed and baked was still frozen in the middle. So we had chicken nuggets and peas instead. Halfway through dinner Hope looked at me and said, "Mommy I have a pea up my nose". WHAT! I looked but did not see anything. We tried blowing her nose a few times but nothing came out so we continued dinner and I forgot about it.
A half hour after dinner she was still blowing on her nose and sniffing. I asked her if the pea was still there and she said yes. I took the shade off the office light and shined it up her nose. Sure enough the little green culprit was stuck up her nose. I could just see the end of it.  I googled "pea up the nose" and lo and behold there was some ideas. I tried one and it didn't work. Then I tried holding her other nostril shut while she blowed. First she sucked it up further. Then she blew really hard twice and the pea shot out of her nose and propelled across the room. Hope and I were cracking up. I was laughing and praising God the little pea came out.
Hope is now retelling the story over and over of how she blew the pea out of her nose. She is such a little ham and loves to tell stories.  I am hoping a lesson was learned though...do not stick peas up your nose!

P.S. I learned a lesson too...make sure your ham is completely defrosted before cooking. Four hours later at 7:30 my ham was ready to come out of the oven. Ugh. Lesson learned.

turning the corner

  
    I think I may have turned the corner in this pregnancy. I have only thrown up twice in the last two and half weeks (yeah!) and now can make it through a day without a nap (yeah again!). I still struggle to stay awake past 8 pm. and I don't remember when I last saw the bottom of the wash pile... but that might not have anything to do with being pregnant. Evenings still tend to be my hardest time of day as far as feeling sick, which is a blessing since Mark is home during those times (although Mark may not always see it that way! )

   Photography has been something on Mark's heart and as been a hobby he has pursued over the last eight years. Over the last month he has had four photo sessions, three of which were in the last week. I have become his editing side kick/prop and design girl. So if it has been quiet here on this blog it is because I have been editing and posting pictures over here at www.hingework.blogspot.com. Check out some of Mark's pics and I hope to be posting some more soon.

   This week I also started crossing some things off the "to- do" list that was accumulating in my head as I spent afternoons laying on the couch. It feels so good even if I pay for it in the evenings. Monday I sewed three pillows for my couch. Mom graciously came and gave me a sewing 101 since I had not been on a sewing machine since 8th grade when I got a C in sewing class. It was fun and I may even think of something else to sew! I also have been wanting to paint my dinning room chairs so I have been working on them little by little when I have energy. Small things really but it feels good to be creative and start feeling like myself again.

Here's to turning the corner....

A Harvest of Joy

It is harvest time here on the farm and the kids love watching all the tractors and combines and other equipmnent come through our driveway. Last week the farmers were baling hay and the hay bales were sitting in the meadow just beckoning us to come play....

A picture to remember this stage of life....Moses lost two of his front teeth and has a nice toothless grin

Daddy and his kids taking the plunge.

My CRAZY kids!

I love this picture of my family. So real life.



Home again, home again.



Looking at these pictures this morning I was reminded again how much I have to be thankful for. A harvest of joy.

life

I said I was not going to hold my breath but I did anyways. Holding parts of my heart back for fear I might get disappointed. Keeping a distance from the Lord afraid He might not really be able to be trusted.
I didn't do these things consciously but they were still there. Whenever worship music came on I would weep, the gaping hole in my heart exposed. I began to realize these things earlier this week and reading over my journal I was reminded again of the Lord's heart for me and the promises He has spoken.
So I should not have been surprised yesterday to find LIFE yet I still was. "Exhale. Breathe. It's really going to be okay."The ultrasound technician turned on the machine and immediately we saw the form of a little baby, kicking and moving, with a steady heartbeat. I was moved to tears. Relief. In awe at the new life growing inside of me. Remaining fear starting to flee...

Little baby Buck at 10 weeks 2 days


I was also surprised to find out I had gained 7 pounds in the last month. Surprising really because I had been throwing up every other day and eating only what would stay down. I shouldn't have been surprised though since my jeans are already tight at only 10 weeks. The extra 7 pounds have kind of formed an inter tube around my middle. I was reminded yesterday of the quote I sent my sister in law when she was very pregnant with her fifth,

"Scars and stretch marks and muffin tops are all part of your kingdom work. One of the greatest testimonies Christian women can have in the world today is the testimony of joyfully giving your body to another."  (Rachel Jankovic)

So I will embrace the muffin top and the extra pounds knowing I am bringing forth another life. A life that is eagerly anticipated.

"God made woman to be a maker, to open her empty places and let life be knit from within her."
(Ann Voskamp)

mama

Hope has been very into reading books these days and one of her favorites recently has been "Hop on Pop". Everytime we get to the last page she points to the one character and says, "That's YOU Mama!"

The other day I studied the mama look alike and started to laugh. The frazzled hair, bags under the eyes, and kind of tired and pale face did bear some resemblance....

I have not been on my "A"game these days. Yesterday was a perfect example. I was laying on the couch, as part of my daily routine, when I thought about how I had not heard the phone ring all day. I decided to check my phone and here all my messages were going straight to voicemail. I listened to the messages and was surprised to hear the school seceratary was calling. She said Moses was very concerned that I was going to forget that today was early dismissal so she was calling to remind me. I looked down at the clock. I had two minutes to get to the end of the lane to catch the bus. I made it and was laughing on the way. What a mom! And what a son! He knows me too well...

that's what brothers are for

Thursday was a big night here at the Buckwalter household. Silas learned to ride without training wheels...

Moses coached Silas through the steps and gave him the push he needed



And he's off....



Moses ran along side of him the whole time encouraging and cheering him on. That's what brothers are for....

We also had a little "bike show"going on with a handmade ramp Moses designed with some bricks and a piece of plywood....

Even Sarah did the jump. Although she was a bit more cautious then Moses who would fly off the ramp...

And the view from the sidelines....

Happy Saturday....

grace

Most days I end up spending the afternoon either on the couch or in my bed. Usually I am out in minutes but some days I just lay there keeping the nausea at bay. On these days I end up daydreaming. In my mind I have decorated, painted furniture and rearranged rooms. In reality there is a pile of dishes in the sink, a mountain of wash, and toys strewn on the floor.

I am reminded again that for me today in this season there is...

(there is also grace for my dusty furniture)

"...If there is anything (mothering) will teach you, is that there is no room to take yourself seriously. Like trying to strike "cool" poses on a rug that someone is continually pulling out from under you, self-seriousness in mothering is totally pointless and probably painful..."

-Rachel Jankovic

I woke up sore all over this morning. Why? Because yesterday I totally slipped on the sidewalk outside the front entrance of Silas's preschool. Totally fell hard and slid across the sidewalk right by the glass doors where everyone was dropping off their kids. Smooth. It hurt bad. Both my body and my pride.

This morning I was thinking back to some of my "great falls". I have some classics. I have this knack for falling and tripping. And although at the time it may be painful it has provided me with some laughter over the years. I can take myself way too seriously but this morning I was reminded that it is good to laugh...even at myself.

Here is a little snapshot of some of my historic falls:

-I fell on the bowling alley in high school on one of my first dates. Totally wiped out on the alley on my back.
-I stepped out of the historic claw foot tub on our honey moon and completely slipped. Mark heard me wipe out but was polite enough to spare me the embarrassment of coming in and finding me sprawled naked out on the floor....yes very romantic
-I had two falls on our honeymoon. The for better or worse was tested right away as I was completely bruised by the end of our trip. I ran down this hill not realizing there was a stone ledge at the bottom. I jumped the wall and fell onto a stone beach that was very unforgiving on my body. A man was fishing in a boat out on the water. Later he saw us and casually said, "That last step is a doozy".
-I got out of the car at Old Navy and tripped while holding hot coffee and the coffee splattered all over the car next to us. Mark was mad but I could not stop laughing.
-There was numerous falls on the boardwalk the most memorable one being the time I was pregnant with Silas and carrying one year old Sarah and hot pizza and totally tripped sending pizza everywhere. My arm took the brunt of the fall and Sarah was fine but a whole crowd of people gathered around me. I wanted to die.
-Another pregnant fall happened when I was expecting Moses. I tripped on the sidewalk walking through the city and tried to catch myself. I kind of started half running trying to catch my balance and ending up slamming into a car and landing between the car and the curb. Mark was having a fit. Why where you running?, he questioned. I was trying to catch myself. I am sure it looked hilarious.

I am sure there are more but these are the ones that had me giggling to myself this morning. I have other embarrassing moments too that don't evolve falling but I will save them for another day....



exhale

I find myself holding my breath. Sometimes it is literally hard to breathe when the anxiousness sets in. I think "if I can just make it through the first trimester than I can breathe easy". But then what if something happens later on in the pregnancy. I hold my breath some more. But even if I deliver a healthy baby we are not guaranteed forever. How long am I going to hold my breath, waiting for the bad news or living afraid of what may come? Why don't I let go now. Exhale. Breathe deep. Trusting the One who holds the future. My holding my breath does not change a thing.
Exhale. Breathe. It's going to be okay

.

the gift of an ordinary day

   Today after lunch I was cleaning up the kitchen and Silas and Hope went outside to play. I didn't think about it till 10 minutes later when I realized it was very quiet. I ran outside and yelled for them. No answer. I searched the yard and they were no where to be found. I started to hurry out the lane yelling their names. No answer. At the corner of our 1/4 mile lane sat Silas and Hope's bikes but they were not with them. I started panicking and screaming their names. At this point I was seriously imagining someone had abducted them. Do I call 911?
 I ran back to the house and looked some more then decided to drive out the lane just in case they had walked out to the end. As I was driving and seriouly panicking I saw them at the end of the lane in the corn field playing. I lost it. It was only 10 minutes but my whole world was flashing before me. And maybe it was partly hormones raging but all I could do was hold those little bodies and cry.
   I think at times as I am sick and throwing up I can forget how blessed I really am...

I'm gonna give an extra hug or two today. Thanking the Lord for these little lives He has entrusted me with.

"It has taken me awhile but I certainly do know it now-the most wonderful gift I had, the gift i finally learned to cherish above all else was the gift of all those perfectly ordinary days."

-Katrina Kenison