a good story.

So a few weeks back I wrote here about how God is writing a good story for us. I then proceeded to spend the next month being stressed out and worried that maybe the end of the story really wasn't going to be that good. And maybe I needed to help God out. There were some twists and turns and I just wanted to skip all of the trusting stuff and just get to the end of the story already.
Two weeks ago on Saturday night while waiting for Mark to come home from a wedding I pulled out my blog and read the entry I had written back in September. "Whoever wrote this had a lot more faith than I do" I thought sarcastically. But I felt God tugging at my heart. I needed to let go and trust again. The next morning I was listening to the radio broadcast of a local church and in the short time I listened the preacher must have said at least ten times "God is writing the story. God is writing the story." I was driving down the road with tears streaming down my face. I got it Lord. I will trust you. I release control.
Three days later we found out about the house we are going to rent in December.

he is a good daddy. he writes good stories. my heart need not fear.

just a little fun.

We will now interrupt this blog for a little advertising. :) My kids got to be in on a little photo shoot for some recent advertising for Jeremy Hess Photographers and had so much fun. I thought I should pass on some fun to all of you who live in Lancaster. Check it out.

Also for all those who are looking for some Christmas card photos....now is the time. All this week Jeremy Hess Photographers is doing Holiday Mini Sessions. Some of the sessions will even be here on our farm! Email Anne at studio@jeremyhessphotographers.com to schedule your session. These are 20 minute sessions which is just the right time for families with young children! Prices range from $100 to $200 including digital negatives. This is a great deal! Check out jeremyhessphotographers.com for more details.

Happy Saturday!

yesterday.

Yesterday I turned 34 although according to their math I am only 23. I'll take it! :) I had a quiet day at home with the kids but a good day filled with messages, cards and birthday greetings. :)

Also yesterday, my in laws celebrated their wedding anniversary so I wanted to send a shout out to them...

 I was thinking of you guys yesterday and hope you are enjoying your get away! Thanks for all that you pour out and invest into our lives and our children's. 

Happy Anniversary! 

wedding season.

I can't believe it is October already...the middle of October at that. September and October have been busy months with wedding photography for Mark. Lots and lots of weddings. One special wedding was our friends, Tyler & Amber. Tyler and Amber are a young couple that we have gotten to walk through life with over the last year. Amber works with Mark at Jeremy Hess Photographers and our kids adore Tyler and Amber. I don't' have the pictures from the wedding yet but I do have a few from the rehearsal dinner. Mark was capturing the whole event and Sarah and Hope were flower girls. Sarah especially loved every minute of it. So many questions about love, and marriage and weddings. And Sarah loved dancing the night away at the reception. When it was over that night she cried as i tucked her into bed, "i was looking forward to this for so long and now it is over". I know sweet girl . I loved all the details at the rehearsal dinner and wedding. Such a beautiful and creative wedding. Here are a few snapshots...

and here's a little wedding preview :)

click here if you interested in seeing more of their beautiful wedding and our girls dancing the night away  :) beautiful beautiful wedding video. it is worth your time.

rest easy.

you are not alone
I will always be with you
Even to the end

You don't have to work so hard
You can rest easy
You don't have to prove yourself
You're already mine
You don't have to hide your heart
I already love you
I hold it in mine
So you can rest easy

Do not be afraid
Nothing, nothing in the world
Can come between us now

You work so hard to wear yourself down
And you're running like a rodeo clown
You're smiling like you're scared to death
You're out of faith and all out of breath
You're so afraid you've got nowhere left to go

Well, you are not alone
I will always be with you

You don't have to work so hard
You can rest easy
You don't have to prove yourself
You're already mine
You don't have to hide your heart
I already love you
I hold it in mine
You can rest easy

~andrew peterson

find rest.

Find REST Oh my soul in God alone...

"Come to ME all who are weary and burdened and I will give you REST"

I came across this quote yesterday and it spoke volumes...

"Mother Teresa said firmly, 'No, I will not (pray that you receive clarity).'"

"When he asked her why, she said, 'Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of." 

When Kavanaugh commented that she always seemed to have the clarity he longed for, she laughed and said, 'I have never had clarity; what I have 

always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God.'"

But I TRUST in You Lord. 

I say "you are my God"

My times are in your hands. 

(psalm 31:14)

eden

So you wonder what it is like to have five kids? Well you have unending piles of wash, maybe lose a few kids at the local fair, and you post your baby's four month pictures well after they turn five months. Oh and you are never ever bored. Tired maybe. Overstimulated yes. But never a dull moment! 

Miss Eden is five months old now and such a sweetie. Lots of giggles and smiles. Starting to love watching the kids and there is always someone or something to watch. So much so that my girl also loves her bed and is getting into more of schedule in nap taking. I don't blame her ....the quiet hum of the fan and the light coming through the window warming up the room does look quite inviting. :)

Eden is also a snuggler and loves to be held and kissed. And as tiring as it can be to try to hold her and make dinner or nurse her at random hours of the night there is also something so special about her sweet baby smell, her adoring eyes, and ways she grasps hold of my finger while she eats...

Oh I love this little girl.

hmmm...

so you think somebody is teething?

Lots of slobber, sleepless nights, and wanting to be held. Praying for her first teeth to come through any day now...please.

this is the way, walk in it.

I have been silent here on the blog. In real life I have been stressed out, uptight and worried. Not anything to write home about. But I also know that blogging can be a good outlet for me so I need to be writing, pouring out my heart and thoughts, declaring the Lord's promises and goodness in our lives.
I wrote a few weeks back that God is writing a good story for us. I truly believe that deep down but when I have not been able to see how the next chapter is going to end instead of faith I have chosen worry, fear, and doubt.
I want to continue to trust the unknown future to an all knowing God. Follow him step by step. Lean in to hear His still small voice whispering, "this is the way, walk in it"

end of the summer barnstormers game.

On a different note, our family went to the Lampeter Fair on Friday night. We have gone every year for the last four years. Usually we try to go at off times but this year we ended up there around 7:00 on Friday night. It was packed, the kids were excited and every few feet we ran into someone we knew. We walked around herding our children and silently taking head counts to make sure we were all together. It was getting late and  cold but the kids wanted to go through one more tent. Mark was ahead of me and I stopped to talk to someone. They wanted to introduce Mark so I called out to him and we all stopped to talk. I was laughing, "Yes we have five kids."...rattling off their names and ages. The woman stopped and said, "you have five kids where are they... i only see three." Mark and I looked at each other as if to say "I thought they were with you". We laughed nervously and looked around. Hope and Silas were missing and were no where to be seen. My mother panic hit full gear and I raced back into the tent. No kids. I ran into another tent frantically searching for them. Finally our friend who had stopped to talk to us found them at a stand helping themselves to a third helping of candy. I asked if they were afraid and Hope said, "We almost were but then decided not to be." Love it. 

It was such a classic parenting moment. Meet my five kids...ummm...where are they? I was laughing after we found them and gave them a good long hug. And this is real life with five kids.:)

Since I have been stressed out the last couple of weeks I have also been short with Mark and the kids. I am not proud of this. The kids have also been acting out a lot which only adds to my frustration and my feeling like a bad mother. But today while looking through some old emails I found this note from Mark that brought tears to my eyes and a smile to my lips. I am reminded of the good memories of summer and the importance of saying "yes" in this next season. It was what I needed to hear this afternoon, thank you Mark and thank you God for bringing perspective to my heart.

heather,

thank you.  thank you for saying yes this summer.

thank you for saying yes to painting on the kitchen table

thank you for saying yes to 5

thank you for choosing to snuggle with Eden while she is little

thank you for the library

thank you for movies

thank you saying yes to an American Girl Doll Party and sleepover

thank you for the barnstormers game

thank you for Kohr Bros custard dipped in chocolate

thank you date nights

thank you for going to Anthropolgie with me

thank you for loving fighter

thank you for the toy train museum

thank you for packing up for the beach (twice)

thank you for making a one hundred and forty year old farmhouse a beautiful home

thank you for making awesome meals 

thank you for homemade salsa

thank you for decorating

thank you for dreaming with me about the farm

thank you for cookies and Pine View Ice Cream (with Readi whip)

thank you for saying yes to me 10 years ago.

thank you for camping out with us!

thank you for taking the kids to swimming lessons

thank you for letting me grill with charcoal even when it's late and the kids are melting

thank you for being who you are

thank you for joining the pool 

thank you for making awesome ice cream birthday cakes

thank you for eating Browns donut with us

thank you for soccer camp

thank you for pizza on the patio at the Buck

thank you for planning to get Mack and Mancos pizza with us!

thank you for blogging about our lives

thank you for putting your heart out there

thank you for saying yes to me when I am a jerk

thank you for all the hours that you pour out for us....we receive so much from you it will never be repaid.

thank you for getting my children ready for the first day of school.  Thank you for being so beautiful.

I love you so much.  

Mark