"Time stands still best in moments that look suspiciously like ordinary life"
During these last six weeks of not feeling like myself one of the things that has been hardest for me to hold on to is perspective. It has made me realize how much I take my health and body for granted and when I can't do what I want to do that is really hard for me. Depression can set in when I only see things through my narrow perspective.
I am feeling better every week and I know the Lord is teaching me so much about myself...learning to rest, letting go of the to do list, how I handle stress, the voices I listen to and so much more. My neck and back issues have caused me to slow down, a gift in itself when I can stop fighting long enough to receive it. Every time people have prayed over me in the last month the words have always been about "rest" so I am starting to finally get it.
Sometimes I feel like I can only rest when all the work is done but with a family of seven there is always things to do. At times even when my body is resting my mind can be listing all the things that are still left undone. It is a continuous choice to change my focus point. I can focus on the mess, the laundry undone, the dishes in the sink, the flower beds that need weeded, the garden left unplanted or I can see the child in front of me wanting to read, the view of the meadow from the porch, the children laughing together while making mischief, the blessing of family, the gift of a husband who loves me. When my heart is at peace I can see these gifts so much clearer than when my mind is frantic and the pace of life is busy.
One of our dear photographer friends asked if she could come and take real life pictures of us for her portfolio. She came on a Sunday morning and captured our weekend ritual of making brunch together. If these pictures had audio it would be loud and messy and chaotic. But these pictures speak volumes in themselves. They remind me of what is important. They put things in perspective.
The gift of an ordinary day.
*Photography by Laura Burkholder