Tuesday, October 21, 2014

my curly haired boy.

Okay let's be honest for a moment about ideals. I think most of us have them. Since we were little girls we dream about our wedding day and our prince charming who is going to come and sweep us off our feet. We build these pictures up in our minds that sometimes look very different than reality.

I remember in high school having the assignment of making a list of qualities we were looking for in a spouse. On my list included things like 'loves God' and 'listens to country music', you know the vitals. I also had a secret list in my head that included him being tall dark and handsome with curly hair and guitar skills so he could sing and write me love songs. I think the curly hair criteria came from my crush on Fred Savage from the "Wonder Years" which we watched faithfully every week as a family. God in his sense of humor gave me a bald headed guy who used to have curly hair as a child. I think He was chuckling about that one. And as far as the guitar goes...Mark doesn't exactly do much pickin' but he does sing classic country songs to me when we drive. Which I love by the way!

Some of the things on my list were good things I needed to hold onto and other things were simply ideals that no one was every going to live up to. And its funny I wanted the "perfect guy" not taking into account that (gasp) i.am.not.perfect. 
Ideals and expectations come up a lot in relationships. We see this in the premarital counseling we do and also in our own marriage. We both come with different ways of thinking and doing things and its learning to work together. Which at times can be messy and challenging. But also beautiful too.

It is funny how when we first got together I really struggled with my ideal fairy tale. There was a lot of ways that Mark was exactly what I hoped for but there was still unrealistic expectations on my part of what it was all going to look like.
Today I find that Mark is my ideal man. He brings out the best in me. He makes me feel beautiful.  I love his rugged good looks. He draws me closer to the Lord.
I am thankful for my bald headed man with a goatee who sings to me old country songs and takes me on motorcyle rides and pushes me out of my comfort zone.  I love that we are both changing and growing on the journey. And along the way becoming more and more the ideal one for each other.

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